I am one of the lucky ones. I have an oncologist who tells me everything very candidly and truly wants/is to heal me and let me get back to the life I once had. But not everyone is so lucky and deciding a poor oncological doctor can, in fact, have the most dire consequences. And as I have gone through this experience thoroughly the following are a few tips that can help in choosing the person that will hold your life in their hands.
1. Don't judge too quickly. My surgeon made a poor and cold impression on me the first time I met her, but she was able to save my leg and remove it's tumor where most docs would have opted to amputate. Furthermore, she is not a cold person at all, quite the oppositte. Like wise my first oncologist whom I had for a mere day seemed very intelligent and i came out of my meeting with her pleased. But she is one of the worst cancer doctors i have ever known, both with patients, after she told me that I should look long and hard at doing treatment as it was probably not going to work, and two with decisions, I have heard countless secondhand reports about this woman and her patients general disregard for her.
2. Remember to ask...would you do this if you were in my position, or would you give this to your child if they were in my position. If they are any sort of honest, this should help. It is a question that will tell you a lot about a doc, 1. their honesty 2. their candor 3. their confidence, all come into the forefront when asking this question. My doctor actually said one of the first times we ever met that he often tries to think about what he would do if his son were in my position, and felt this was the best thing. This comforted me.
3. Find a doctor who has no ego. Well maybe no ego would be a bad thing but you want your doctor to not be stubborn. If a doc believes that he or she is constantly making the best decisions they might be less likely to consult with others who could help you or other patients. There is no such thing as having too much talk about a patient amongst doctors.
4. Establish as personal a relationship as you can with your oncologist. The more the doc(s) get to know you and like you the more emotional attachment your treatment will have with the doctor therefore making it one that the doctor will work overtime to get right.
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